I'm sure some of you saw this article on yahoo a while ago. Well when I read this article it really made me think. I love both of my kids equally. But depending on the day or moment and how they behave I will like one more than the other.
I have noticed (even before reading this article) that sometimes when Lily is bothering Tyler and he gets upset and pushes her I get upset with him and show Lily more affection, even though technically she was the one who started it. I have realized that showing her the affection and telling him he should not do that is only showing favoritism towards Lily :basically saying she can do no wrong.
I have started backing out of their little fights and letting them work it out themselves. If he pushes her I try and just tell him what he did was not nice and to not do it again. I try not to put him in timeouts too much because sometimes he does not understand what he is doing is wrong. They like to rough house and sometimes one of them gets hurt. I don't put her in timeout when she hurts him so why should I do it to him?
This is a hard thing to practice when you have a 2 year age difference in kids. Hell I'm sure its hard to practice altogether because how often do you really notice that you are favoring one kid?? It is just something that we as parents need to work hard at trying not to do and if it happens we need to try and correct it fast before it has long lasting effects on our kids. Which is a feeling that I'm sure a lot of people reading this may have towards their parents, I know I'm one of those people.
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