As some of you know I'm not a very religious person. If anything I am kind of antireligious I guess? I don't really put much thought into that whole thing so I don't know. But as a somewhat educated (as much as I can remember) person I would like my children to be aware of all choices out there. I don't want my beliefs to come in the way of something they may want to believe in. I want them to understand different aspects of religions so when the time comes that they may feel the need to choose one they know their options.
I don't believe in forcing my beliefs on my children. I want them to believe in whatever they want even if its nothing at all. I will teach them to accept people of all races, genders, and religions. I will accept whatever choices they make in life... as long as they are within reason (things like dropping out of high school are not acceptable) but when it comes to choosing gender or religion I really couldn't care less what they choose to announce themselves as.
But before any of this happens they have to know what religion is. Within the past week the topic of death, God, Angels, and Buddha has come up with Tyler and trying to explain this stuff to him was hard. I mean think about talking to a four year old who responds to every statement with a question.
Ex: Me: Well daddy's grandma isn't here anymore.
Tyler: Where is she?
Me: Well, heaven I guess?
Tyler: What's heaven?
Me: Its where God and the Angels live.
Tyler: Who's God and Angels?
Me: Umm...
Obviously I did the best I could to explain why Mike's grandma isn't here anymore. And I did my best to explain who God and the Angels are but I'm not sure how much got through. Then there's the topic of death where I don't even know how to approach that. And then we see statues of Buddha so I now have to try to explain not only God but another type of God? And what happens when we see Jesus on the cross? How do I explain THAT to a four year old?
I want him to know everything he can but its hard to explain it to someone who can only comprehend so much. So do I say we will come back to this later? I have noooo clue. I do know that when it comes to Holidays I will explain their true meaning to my kids. Not just oh Santa comes this day to bring us presents. I will tell them the story behind it because I feel its an important part of tradition whether I believe in Mary the "virgin" or not.
But what do I tell a four year old and a two year old that they will understand? I have basically just been winging it. I answer questions to the point where I cant figure out an answer anymore. Like where do babies come from kind of stops at mommy's belly because then they ask how and then they ask well how did the baby come out?
The baby thing is a tough topic, but so is death, and God and then there's all the other stuff out there that I only know so much on. Like how do I even breach these topics? They should seriously make a mandatory parenting class to help parents answer these types of questions for their kids because seriously it gets overwhelming.
I've gotten sucked into these questions where at the end Mike and I are looking at each other like WTF just happened here? Or he says why did you tell him that? Well... because he asked? Am I supposed to just lie to him? Or only tell him part of the truth? But then later change the story because he's older and can understand it better but then he's confused as to why I didn't tell him that in the first place. Seriously. This stuff has my mind spinning!
I would love to just sit in on another parent and child conversation to see what not to tell my kid. So I can say like yeah...you went to far when you showed the kid how grandpa died but thank you because now I know not to do that. So any parents with a four year old out there who plan to explain the workings of life to their kid in the near future please let me know so I can sit in on that conversation...
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